


It was all miscommunication

by luvstars



Category: SHINee
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-26
Updated: 2016-05-26
Packaged: 2018-07-10 07:05:50
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,536
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6972193
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/luvstars/pseuds/luvstars
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"He was more than wrong. He was played. Jinki was just someone else to sleep with to Jonghyun, while it was going to mean everything to him."</p>
            </blockquote>





	It was all miscommunication

**Author's Note:**

> this fic includes sex themes and talk about being drunk/alcohol!
> 
> i wrote this for [colorful vvorld](http://colorful-vvorld.livejournal.com/) fic fest. go read the other stories <3
> 
> sorry for spelling/grammar mistakes!

Jinki nearly gets hit with a pillow the moment he walks in through the door. He isn’t surprised to see Minho and Jonghyun yelling and laughing on his couch. It’s more like Minho’s yelling about some video game he just came second in and Jonghyun’s teasing him about it, so naturally he flings a pillow and instead of it hitting Jonghyun it nearly slams Jinki in the face. It misses him by a few inches, though.

He takes off his shoes and goes near them, “Thanks for the welcome to my own home.”

Jonghyun laughs again and Minho looks startled to even see him there.

“I’m sorry,” Minho tells him. “That was meant for Jonghyun.”

“You missed,” he makes sure to tell him.

“I wouldn’t if he hadn’t ducked!”

“You didn’t have to throw a pillow at me! You’re just mad that I won and you lost-“

“Ya!” Kibum walks out from the kitchen. “I’ve had enough of the yelling. I’m trying to teach Taemin how to cook here!”

“Sorry,” they all say in unison.

“One of you help me set the table, please.”

 

When Kibum’s finally done and the table is set, dishes are being filled and clanks of spoons and forks scrape the plates cleans.

“Why does Taemin need to learn how to cook anyways?” Jonghyun randomly asks breaking the silence of all of them practically inhaling their food.

“I don’t,” Taemin rolls his eyes.

“I got a new job and I needed a student.”

“You could’ve asked me,” Minho scrunches his face.

“No chance,” Kibum doesn’t even hesitate.

“Why not?” Minho pouts.

“You don’t like learning. You like being right and I need someone who lets me influence them. You’d get mad if I tried to correct you.”

Jinki sees Minho think for a second before he just nods. He can’t help but snicker cause Kibum didn’t lie. Kibum and Minho always bicker with one another, even being as close as they are now there being a point where the two of them hated each other. Now they’re the best of friends.

“So we have two birthdays coming up,” Kibum turns to look at him first and then Minho.

“Oh god,” Jonghyun breathes.

“You’re going to throw us a party, aren’t you?” Minho asks.

“I have to! Jinki and Jonghyun are almost done with school and it’ll be the last time we can all celebrate together university style.”

“I’m okay with it,” he smiles at Kibum.

Minho looks at him for a second before looking back at Kibum, who’s giving him pleading eyes. As much as they all love teasing him because he’s the easiest to get a rise from they don’t have the heart to say no to him. Even more so when he wants to throw them parties.

“Fine,” Minho agrees.

 

Jinki moves to him room to study after they’re done eating.

“So what do you want for your birthday?” Jonghyun walks into his room without knocking.

He’s not surprised by the action. Jonghyun has always had personal space issues even more so with him. After they moved out from their dorm room and now living in separate apartments on the same floor of the same building nonetheless. He still not surprised whenever he just walks in and makes himself at him; to be fair Minho and Taemin do the same but that’s more for Kibum’s cooking if he’s honest.

“A hug,” Jinki looks up from his book.

Jonghyun jumps on his bed, knocking one of his notebooks of the bed. “I’m being serious.”

“So am I.”

“Okay but don’t come crying to me when you only get a hug and I get Minho a cool present.”

“I won’t,” he smiles at him, going back to reading his book in silence.

“Oh c’mon,” Jonghyun pleads. “Just tell me.”

Jinki puts his book down and stares down at Jonghyun who decided to place himself at the foot of his bed. “I really don’t mind, Jonghyun. Whatever you want to get me is fine. I personally want a hug from you but I’ll take whatever you get me.”

Jonghyun taps his chin and smiles gives him a small smile before speaking, “Okay.”

 

Jinki doesn’t do much the day the party arrives. Kibum decides to throw the party at the other three’s place since it larger than theirs and he doesn’t have a problem with it. It’s better that way since he knows how Kibum can get when he’s preparing a party. He fusses over a lot of things and if there’s anything he’s learned about living with him is to get out of the way. Since Kibum didn’t request anything from him other than making sure to arrive to the party at the right time he just sleeps most of the day away.

 

When the clock strikes 8PM he knows he has to start to get ready. He heads to the showers and lets his body soak in the warmth of the water flowing down his back and his sides. He gently massages the shampoo through is hair and washes his body clean. When he gets out of the shower he pulls his out his boxers, a pair of black pants, and a nice white shirt and he’s ready to go. His hair dries fast and he just lets it call down on his face. He’s never done much to it. He places his shoes on and finally makes his way a few doors open where he can already hear the music coming from the other side of the door.

 

When Jinki walks through the door he can hear a loud shout say _Jinki’s here_ and everyone turns towards the door to say happy birthday to him and approach him giving him hugs and slaps on the back.

He works his way through people, smiling and laughing accepting the kind words they have to offer. The party as always looks lively and there’s food everywhere. He isn’t even surprised to see that Kibum somehow managed to get a medium sized chocolate fountain.

Jonghyun finds him once he’s done with people and he’s being pulled into the kitchen where not a lot of people seem to be. He looks up to see Jonghyun with an excited expression and he would be more confused if he didn’t find him so endearing.

“What’s going on?”

Jonghyun smiles before whispering, “I got you a present.”

“Why are you whispering?” Jinki whispers back.

“Oh,” Jonghyun laughs. “I didn’t notice. I think since it’s been a secret. It felt right.”

Jinki can’t help but smiles at him. He could never help how adorable he finds whatever Jonghyun does. He’s always had some kind of pull over him. It’s a long time ago that Jinki finally let himself explore his feelings for Jonghyun but he never once expressed them. He never acted on them. Jinki always figured being the friend is better than being nothing at all. Even if his breath hitches a bit whenever Jonghyun’s touch meets his.

Jonghyun places a small box in his hands and he smiles widely, “Go on! Open it.”

Jinki tilts his head before he pulls out what the box contains and his heart starts to race because he really can’t believe.

“How?” he says in awe.

“Do you like it?” Jonghyun nearly jumps up and down.

“I- “

Jinki’s at a loss of words.

In their first year of university Jinki broke something that was really special to him. He was really close to his grandpa, besides his parent he was Jinki’s favorite person in the world and before he passed on he gave him a watch he had since he was young. It was the only thing he really had left of him and he wore it with a lot of love and care. One night he was stupid enough to forget to take it off while he was playing goal keeper at a friendly soccer game among dorms that when he tried to go for a ball he hit himself against a goal post and his watch cracked in so many ways. He really cried that night especially knowing he’d have no way to pay for how much it’d cost to fix it. He never really told anyone about it so he can’t wrap his mind around Jonghyun knowing let alone getting it fix for him.

His mouth isn’t working so he just brings Jonghyun into a hug. “Thank you.”

“Happy birthday.”

“How’d you know?”

“I saw how hurt you were over it while I was watching everyone on the sidelines that night. Kibum found it once when he was nagging me about cleaning our dorm,” Jonghyun rolls his eyes. ”He mentioned it when he found it. I remembered about it the other day so I snuck into your room while you were at school and go it. Since I get enough money working at the school’s radio show I didn’t think much of it.”

“This must have cost a lot,” Jinki says.

“Don’t worry about it.”

Before he can say anything Taemin comes over handing them drinks and telling both of them to start socializing.

Jinki spends most of his night attached to Jonghyun. He dances most of the night away with him. They drink and play beer pong with a few other friends most of the time together. Even when Taemin and Kibum come out with a cake for him and one for Minho, Jonghyun is right next to him telling him to blow out the candles. He feels warm inside. He feels happy.

 

Jinki feels a little more than intoxicated. He feels light and heavy at the same time, in the sense where he could sway easily but hit the floor hard. It doesn’t help that Jonghyun is practically all over him. Jinki has been used to this the past but it doesn’t stop his heart from racing and his hands from sweating. He feels like the he did four years ago when Jonghyun walked through their dorm room introducing himself. Jinki couldn’t really form a word let alone a sentence and Jonghyun took it as him being shy but really he was mesmerized by his beauty. His big puppy eyes really making him lose himself in them. He feels like that again. He feels infatuated.

“We should really get you to bed,” Jonghyun grabs him around the waist. “You can sleep here tonight.”

Jinki can’t do anything but just sink himself into Jonghyun’s touch. Letting him guide him to his room, he could get their himself but really why would he want to? Jonghyun smells is the only thing he can really think about.

It isn’t long before Jinki’s back hits a mattress and he’s looking up at the ceiling waiting for sleep to take over. It doesn’t come anytime soon and he’s just content with hearing Jonghyun ramble about weird things until a few of his words gets Jinki’s attention.

“You’re kind of handsome, did you know that?”

“W-What?”

“You’re handsome.”

“Thank you?” Jinki hesitates.

“You’re smart too,” Jonghyun smiles, getting up from where he’s lying down and getting closer and closer to Jinki. “Also you’re funny and sweet and caring…”

Jinki can feel his cheeks heating up and he can’t do much as he becomes face to face with Jonghyun There’s this bubble that’s forming around both of them and he can’t help but not want it to burst because it feels sort of right.

“Why are you saying all of this?” Jinki asks.

“I feel like people don’t tell you that enough. You’re special, Jinki.”

He can practically feel Jonghyun’s lips near his.

“I- “

Jonghyun launches onto himself and kiss him before he can finish his sentence and Jinki can’t process anything. It takes him three seconds before his hands find Jonghyun’s neck and he brings him close. He’s dreamed about this before but in all of them he wakes up before he can truly get his chance to touch Jonghyun. Jinki wants to erase every single space between them possible.

Jonghyun practically shoves Jinki onto his back and he climbs onto his lap, deepening the kiss more and more. Their hands start to room and Jonghyun grabs at the end of Jinki shirts, with no words pleading him to get it off. Jinki doesn’t even think twice before he starts to unbutton it, he’s never been one for skin exposure but that part of himself flies out the window. Jonghyun moves down to Jinki’s neck once his top half is exposed and he moans shamelessly. He’s glad the party is still happening outside and the music’s still thumping because there’s no way that if the apartment was silent that would’ve gone unheard.

Once Jinki gets used to the feeling he goes to take Jonghyun’s shirt off. He’s a step ahead of Jinki although because he grabs at it and throws it to the floor.

Jinki doesn’t realize how fast things start moving because he’s lost in everything. He’s lost in the kisses, the moans, the touches, he’s lost in Jonghyun. He’s mesmerized by the sounds Jonghyun makes and the faces he forms whenever he does something that makes him react. He tries to touch Jonghyun likes he’s everything, like he’s the perfect human being Jinki thinks he is. For so long Jinki has wanted something like this, he knows he’s a little more than intoxicated but he knows what’s doing and he knows what his heart wants. He kisses Jonghyun with his whole being and he explores his body to get to know what makes him feels good. He wants Jonghyun to feel _more_ than good.

“I’m so glad I chose you for this,” Jonghyun says after a small moan.

And Jinki stops.

He freezes.

His heart stutter.

He slowly looks up at Jonghyun and he sees it in his eyes that he can’t believe he actually said that out loud. They’re both at a standstill, neither of them making the first move knowing really well that the small bubble they dove into is seconds from falling apart. It isn’t until Jinki hears something crash outside of Jonghyun’s door does he move. He’s desperately looking around for his clothes. He can feel the tears welling up in his eyes and he just needs to get out of Jonghyun’s room before he actually does something as stupid as letting them fall. He refuses to let Jonghyun see how he feels. He feels dirty. He feels used. Most of all he feels heart broken.

He can hear the shifting of sheets but he can’t even begin to think at looking the way it’s coming from.

“Jinki, please look at me.”

“I have to go,” Jinki says, throwing on his last piece of clothing.

“That’s not what I meant! Jinki!”

 

He cries the moment he gets to his apartment. It suddenly feels like a blessing that it didn’t work out with the five of them living together. He’s suddenly so grateful that he decided to move in with Kibum. He feels like running to his room but he doesn’t even get there, he throws himself on the couch and lets out a loud sob. He feels pathetic. It’s not like Jonghyun ever expressed that he felt the way Jinki did. It’s not like Jinki ever expressed to Jonghyun either. But he thought that something had changed. The way he gave him something that was so precious to him tonight or the fact that he was showering Jinki in compliments. He thought that through the actions that built up to what almost happened was an understanding but he was so wrong.

So damn wrong.

He was more than wrong. He was played.  Jinki was just someone else to sleep with to Jonghyun, while it was going to mean everything to him.

 

Jinki doesn’t have time to worry about anything like that for the rest of the week and for the first time in his life he’s happy that finals are coming up. He dives himself into his studies and he doesn’t leave his room for anything other than going to his classes and the library. Kibum sometimes has to force feed him, making sure he gets into the shower to bathe and actually get to sleep at night.

 

“Okay what’s going on?” Kibum finally corners him one late afternoon.

‘What do you mean?”

“You’ve been acting strange since finals. I thought it was because you’re worried about your second to last semester or worried about your grades but...”

“It’s nothing, Kibum.”

“It’s something,” Kibum pauses. “But I won’t push it either.”

Jinki lets out a shaky breath after Kibum leaves the room. It’s something he’s always loved about Kibum; he shows concern but he never pushes on it either. It feels nice to know that he has someone to turn to if he really needs it.

 

Jinki finally starts to go out more. He doesn’t spend as much time as he does around the other threes apartment but he finally gains some footing to socialize. He really needed it. As much as he loves to be a home-body and just sleep, he needs fresh air and human contact every once in a while.

He didn’t expect to see Jonghyun when he arrives to the location that he agreed to eat dinner with Minho. But he really shouldn’t have expected anything different, knowing really well that if he’s invited by Minho, that means Taemin’s tagging along and if Taemin’s tagging along that means Jonghyun isn’t too many steps behind.

It’s awkward, to say the least.

He doesn’t purposely ignore Jonghyun, he doesn’t want to make anyone else feel uncomfortable but he doesn’t go out of his way to actually engage in conversation with Jonghyun either. He’ll reply if he’s talked to but he won’t start to conversation either.

 

“Can we please talk?” Jonghyun pleads when they all get to their building.

“What about?” Jinki lets his voice remain indifferent.

“Jinki,” Jonghyun breathes. “Please.”

Jinki can’t be cold. He can’t continue to shut Jonghyun out as much as he wants to. He wants Jonghyun to feel the way he felt that night but the way he says his name or he breathes out please is enough for Jinki’s heart to stammer and he can’t hurt him.

Jinki’s finger anxiously run through his hair and he nods, he doesn’t say anything but let’s Jonghyun follow him up the stairs and into his and Kibum’s apartment.

“Let’s move to couch,” Jinki tells him.

They both move to the living room awkwardly.

“I don’t know where to start,” Jonghyun says.

Jinki doesn’t say anything, just keeps looking at the way Jonghyun is playing with his fingers in his lap.

“It was stupid. I was stupid.”

“You’re not stupid.”

“But I am,” Jonghyun laughs coldly. “Taemin was joking around that I’m still a virgin and I need to lose it before I graduate. I know part of him was teasing me how he always was but he was kind of right. I’m in my last year of university and I’ve never been laid. It’s pathetic.”

“That’s nothing to be ashamed of- “

“I know.” Jonghyun cuts him off. “I know. But I still felt ashamed. He even joked that Kibum would probably do it with me if I asked or he would himself, anything to help a friend you know how he is.”

Jinki laughs lightly.

“Then I thought if I’ve been waiting so long it has to be special. It made me feel cheesy and weird but I just kept thinking it had to be with someone I care about and someone who cares for me...”

Jinki’s heart starts to race, “And?”

“That’s you.”

“Me?”

“Yes. It’s always been you and I didn’t realize it until I stayed up all night thinking about it. I didn’t mean to hurt you. I didn’t even mean it in that way. I’m so sorry I hurt you. I couldn’t believe I did that to you and it hurt so much but I deserved it. I hurt you and I just want you to know that I like you… I’ve always liked you. You’re special and…”

Jinki’s at a loss of words because he never expected this from Jonghyun. Not after he felt that night of his combined birthday party. Not after he built the idea that Jonghyun was just using him for another lay, which can’t even be true because Jonghyun still has never even been laid before. His mind and heart are both racing in different directions but ultimately it’s his heart that wins.

Jinki grabs at Jonghyun’s chin and he places a small peck on his lips.

“I thought you were using me.”

Jonghyun eyes open so wide he looks like a cartoon animation. “I would never. I’m so, so sorry I made you feel that way.”

Jinki feels so relieved about everything. He can’t help but breathe easier and smile without a force when he pulls Jonghyun closer once more not for a kiss but to just be near each other. Jonghyun places his head on Jinki’s chest and they both breathe a sigh of relief.

“We should do more talking next time shouldn’t we?” Jonghyun pokes at Jinki’s stomach.

“It was all miscommunication.”


End file.
